That was THE single best movie I have EVER seen, no matter what the stupid film critics say. The action was amazing, the robots were wicked, and the humor was awesome.
The plot may have left a TEENY bit to be desired, as you can tell that the film focuses more on giant robots fighting than it does on the actual PLOT, but hey, thats good enough for me.
Jetfire was completely awesome and hilarious. The old fart brought down three Decepticons in less than a minute(or maybe IN a minute), and then actually KILLED himself so Prime could save the day.
Plus he said something that will forever be my favorite quote.

"My father was a wheel. The FIRST wheel! And do you know what he transformed into? NOTHING! But he did so with HONOR, DIGNITY!"

Wheelie was funny too, and is one of my favorite characters from the film- despite his eerie affection for Mikaela.(Not sure if thats how you spell it)

I thought the inclusion of a Pretender was wicked awesome, but the five-foot long tongue with an ACTUAL human tongue on the tip was a bit creepy.

Skids and Mudflap...I expected them to be annoying. I expected to want them to die. But no, I watched them...and I liked what I saw.
They are the most OBVIOUS stereotypes I have EVER seen- and they are HILARIOUS for it.

"OW, that hurt!"
"Of course it hurt, its an ass whoopin'!"

So in my opinion...A brilliant movie, definitely worth watching. Unless you actually LISTEN to film critics.

The long awaited sequel to Michael Bay's 2007 juggernaut Transformers has finally crash-landed to the delight of millions. With the cash it's raking up and all of the talk and speculation that continues to unfurl, wishes are being granted with this one. It's a whole lot bigger and a whole lot badder which can only mean that Revenge of the Fallen is pure, unadulterated cinematic salvation, right? Right?....

=*=

Two years have passed, and while the Autobots continue to keep the Decepticons at bay amidst a cover-up of the Mission City shootout, Sam Witwicky is trying to regain some normalcy by setting off to college. After coming in contact with a piece of the AllSpark, he gains vast knowledge about the Transformers' history, including a map to a powerful energy draining device known as the Sun Harvester and its key, the Matrix of Leadership. It's now a race against time for Sam, Mikaela, and some new and old friends to travel to Egypt and snag the Matrix of Leadership before the Decepticons and the mysterious and powerful Fallen reach it first.


Let's get this out of the way: Michael Bay isn't known for directing cinematic masterpieces as far as storyline and character development goes. Nearly every human is some far-out, unrelatable, and stupid shmuck with the propensity to overact and spout one-liners and profanities at every conceivable moment. The new Autobots who manage to secure more then ten minutes of screentime are endowed with these same fabulous quirks, but with the added pinch of groan-worthy racial stereotyping and sexuality. A great deal of the humor and the development is so trashy and random that you're just not going to care for any of these guys, even more so than the prequel whose condensed cast allowed us at least a second to grow and empathize with the characters and their descent into the war.


However, most readers are probably aware of this anyways and are just seeing thus for the epic mecha fighting action, in which case I am apathetic to report that you will and won't be disappointed. In terms of scale, the battles all surpass the first. The animation, creativity, and detail is a pure eye-gasm and you'll undoubtedly be hypnotized by the sight of robots tearing each other apart in awesome ways, assuming you can focus through the shaky and spinning camerawork of course. Where does the disappointment come in? Although these parts are lengthy in comparison to the prequel, there's only three fights total which means the good parts are again completely dwarfed by the amount of scum you must wade through to get to them. And in a two and a half hour movie, that's a lot of scum.


Perhaps the sheer lack of the major Autobots' presence is partially to blame for just how soulless and dragged out this movie can feel. First, their admirable honor has made them slavish partners to the government which means they can only walk around and be deployed when some insignificant general tells them to. Secondly, when they are employed early on in the film, Optimus goes the way of his '86 animated counterpart and gets himself killed, lowering morale and allowing the government to further keep them at bay. Unfortunately, the Decepticons aren't much better off. We see them regrouping, scheming, whining about humanity, and maybe killing a few soldiers, but they're still just as absent to make way for what Mr. Bay thinks we really want to see: Sam and Mikaela dicking around in the desert.


As much as I could further tear this movie apart, especially with the fracking deus ex machina, the fact remains that I give it props for doing what it set out to do and doing it well. I laughed when I was supposed to (not nearly as much as the audience, of course) and indeed the battles did not disappoint. There's probably something here for every moviegoer, even the stuck-up ones like me who playfully passed the time with my friend by playing "Spot The American Flag" or interpreting the scenes in hilarious ways. It's silliness at its finest, pure popcorn fare, so you're going to have some fun regardless of the sickening direction of the film which I guess is all I should've asked for.

It used almost the exact same music from the first movie. It used the exact same ending as the first movie. We didn't even NEED a sequal. The first movie ended so perfectly! So perfectly they had to go and invent a new villain! And if the first movie had the same ending as the second, I know that another bad sequal is sure to come, and I can come back and write this same rant again.

Optimus was taking in all of those Decipticons on the woods it was EPIC, probably my favorite fight scene in the whole Transformers series so far.