Timothy Ulysses Crusader

 

So, let's recap;

Shadow's ring bracers aren't just some peculiar and incredibly dubious fashion statement; they are in fact devices (whether they be magical, mystical or technological in nature) used to contain his godmodded powers to a more bareable level that remains safely under nine thousand. They are also used to hide his emorific wrists.

Am I following this properly so far?

Timothy Ulysses Crusader

 

Seriously though, it's Sonic; what do you expect, realism? Pshaw! If Sonic can run at supersonic speeds without levelling entire city blocks with the sonic booms that SHOULD be ripping through the air behind him, if Amy Rose can achieve Awesomeness, if Knuckles can punch through solid cement without shattering every bone in his fist, if Cream's goddamn EARS can't even point in the right direction, if Rouge doesn't even need to flap her wings to fly, then Tails doesn't need school to be a Hyper-Mensa member.

Timothy Ulysses Crusader

 

According to the Laws of Awesomeness, if the need is dire and the circumstances call for it, Amy automatically trumps all other characters.

Timothy Ulysses Crusader

 

Amy Rose without a doubt; how can you not love Spontaneous Hammer Generation and Extraordinary Rage as powers?
She owns many robots with her super pwning hammer. I think her problem is that if caught by surprise, she automatically drops her hammer, no Dexterity roll required (in case you're wondering, that was possibly another one of my epically failing jokes).
Besides, to REALLY start beating things up, she needs to be 'in the zone'. The trigger seems to vary from time to time, from "Don't interrupt me while talking to Sonic," and "I'm pissed because I can't find Sonic," to "So-and-so insulted me," and "It's that time of the month again."
Plus she's like Mr T in that due to the Law of Sheer Awesomeness, she can beat the crap out of anyone she wishes (downing an Egg Fort singlehandedly is a prime example of her awesome factor).
It's a shame she can't pity foo's; then she'd be the epitomy of destruction. Thumbs up to the day Lady Fury learns Pity Foo'.

Timothy Ulysses Crusader

 

My evil-game-of-doom-do-not-buy-it-or-it-will-devour-your-sense-of-amusement is easily Battlestar Galactica for the Xbox. Now, flying games are all well and fine (especially space dog-fights because they are super-duper fun (especially ejecting from your ship and watching your little pilot drift into the void of black)), but a game that is impossible to beat the first level on EASY??!!?!?!?!
"Captain Adama, we need you to take down those Cylon bombers!"
10 bombers. Ten minutes later, there are eight bombers left.
"Captain Adama! We are in dire need of your assistance! The bombers are attacking the bridge! I don't know how much longer we can hold out!"
Right. One minute later...
"Oh my god, it's... it's too late! We're *static*"
Cutscene shows the Battlestar exploding and Cylon bombers fleeing the explosion, doubtlessly sitting safely inside their heavily armoured fighters going "LOL we are teh win. ROFLMAO did joo c that humans face? Buncha laffs. OLOLOL. OMG wat a bunch of nubs."
I hate the game with a passion.

Wowzaa1

 

Banned because I LOVE YOU.

Timothy Ulysses Crusader

 

BANNED: For... wait, WHAT?

sMy PANCAKES

 

Remember kids... naplam is used on OTHER people. NOT yourself.