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The Ultimate Weapon: Man or Beast?
The human shrouded in the black coat looked up at the announcement of the meeting. Sounds important. Sounds like something that guard can't miss, he thought, staring out his cell door at the old cat that served as his guard. Wait for it. Don't take it too hasty; concentrate on one thing at a time. First, I'll need to melt through these chains once he's gone. Within a minute, the cat got whatever he was working on in order, jangled the keys just outside the door to his cell as if to mock the prisoner, and left. He hadn't caused any trouble yet, and he was the only prisoner held here. Thankfully. Once the cat was out of sight, the human closed his eyes and the palms of his hands, behind his back, gripped the chain of his handcuffs and glowed red-hot. Let's try this again. Faster now.

The Ultimate Weapon: Man or Beast?
A bit straggly; am I too late and/or are outsider characters like mine frowned upon?

Name: Taylor Hiss
Species: Human
Gender: Male
Weapons: 25
Abilities: Pyrogenesis/pyrokinesis (observed) and "dimension-jumping" (claimed, unprovable)
Appearence: A fair-skinned, dark-haired and dark-eyed human with a reedy build and dark, heavy clothes like a bomber jacket and jeans. His weapons; a large pistol with the semi-automatic cycling mechanism removed and a dark green sniper's rifle whose magazine can't be removed, had both been confiscated upon apprehension.
Brief Bio: A mysterious man who appeared within the base a few days previously with no indication of how he got where he is. Now he resides in a cell, assumed to be an agent of Eggman's, despite his insistence on the impossible tale he had told when first captured.

A future to remember
Name: Taylor Richard Hiss
Age: 27
Species: Human
Weapons: A glossy black modified high-caliber handgun (looks semi-automatic but isn't); a dark green sniper rifle with an irremovable magazine (claimed to be enchanted, possessed, made by demons, or all three; called the "Komodo's Snipe" or "Cain", and actually is possessed)
Personality: Generally easygoing and friendly (though respect's another matter entirely), although easily annoyed and angered when ignored or bossed around.
Appearance: Taylor is a lean, long-legged human with fair skin, dark brown hair and eyes to match the hair. He often dresses heavily in blacks and dark blues, this time wearing a navy denim jacket over a black sleeveless shirt with jeans just two shades lighter than the coat.
Background: A strange human mercenary with power over fire; he seems mysterious, but only because nobody seems to care enough to ask.

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It's likely some karmic bullshit for sleeping in on a Sunday.

I WORKED 'TIL 2 AM LAST NIGHT, DAMMIT!

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Today sucked.

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Yo...

Homecoming
Taylor nodded. "Yeah, it's complicated. I'd overheard something about a plot to overthrow the council in power at the time; now I didn't think much of it, but the people who were trying to do it didn't want witnesses. Ultimately, I got shot and had just fallen off a bridge when I first jumped dimensions." He shrugged and slowed down. "Any other questions before we go any farther? Because once we get into town, we're gonna cause a big-time stir. Don't want you guys going in blind." The breeze was dying down, the dust settling.

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Lousy stupid goddamn Sonic 4 final boss...

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I am a goddamn free radical here. Appear and depart as I wish, doing whatever the hell I want; and these shenanigans... I DON'T WANT HAPPENIN'.

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...Pthhhh. So bored...

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Do not, I repeat, DO NOT belittle a Super Mutant for taking the bunny slope.

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Entertain us, Devlin.
Preferably by exploding.

*reverse-pickpockets a plasma grenade*

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Meh, just bored outta my skull; mother won't let me on the PC on account of we ditched the monitor and hooked it to the TV.

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Alright, what the hell did I do?

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And with that, the shenanigans resume.

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I swear, sometimes I'm the only sane member around.

I mean, sure, I often pay lip service (giggity) to the normal shenanigans, but goddamn, enough is enough, and it feels like I'm the only one with the slightest clue how much is "enough".

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Can we just shut up about the guy?

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Aaaaaah, Perry the platypus, your timing is impeccable. And by 'impeccable' I mean COMPLETELY PECCABLE!

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It's a very low effort costume. I've had the components since before Phineas and Ferb aired.

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*cobbles together a low-effort Heinz Doofenshmirtz costume*

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