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Simon says: "Get to ze pay phone in Wall Street Station by ten-twenty or ze number three train and all of its passengers vaporize"

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Quote:
 
You are currently number 5 in the queue. We apologize for the delay. We will assign you to an advisor as soon as one is available. The average amount of time a customer has to wait is 41 minutes.


You are currently number 1 in the queue. We apologize for the delay. We will assign you to a homicidal Cy-Fox as soon as he's done loading ammunition into his magazines and fueling his chainsaw.

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Jin-Gitaxias, Core Augur
Jul 30 2011, 10:56 PM
I dunno, I just feel that way. So I got a little drunk, it's not like I said anything bad.
Bro, EA support is making me crave alcohol products right now. And a sledgehammer.

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-opens desk drawer, pulls out a tactical suitcase nuke, arms it and walks away towards EA-

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-slams Rammstein into his MP3 player while waiting for tier-2 of EA support to queue him up-

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Ktim is winning and he doesn't even have tiger blood. -lightly taps Pepsi machine and gets a free can-

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-walks in playing a mad awesome Van Halen guitar solo one handed while holding a shotgun-

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I hate frigates with a burning passion now.

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-eats cupcakes- One last week of class to do, then in about 22 days I'll be working at home for the ninth circle of technological Hell Apple's support staff.

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Ohey guys, I got a job now.

As an Apple support adviser. -raises gun to head-

Terrorist attack Oslo.
Get this. Apparently the shooter, Anders Behring Breivik, was sold six tons of fertilizer from a farm supply company. Brevik supposedly ran a farming company, but come on! It doesn't take a genius to figure out that he might've had a hand in the bombing. Fertilizer was used to make the bomb that took out the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in 1995. In fact, I'd just about wager that the bomb was meant to tie the police up. It took an hour and a half for an armed response to be mounted because resources were stretched.

Home Users and Computer Security
I really wouldn't touch viruses unless you had a very good controlled environment to tear one apart in. As in a separate dedicated computer that isn't hooked into a network, and maybe with a VM to dissect it in to boot.

Home Users and Computer Security
The following is an argument synthesis I just completed for my college composition class:

The average person sees a computer as simply a system that acts as a storage device and a gateway to the Internet. What they do not understand, that these two functions can conspire to serve as a great threat to their privacy. The average user needs to be informed about current security issues as well as preventative and reactive measures to these threats. Staying in the dark puts the user at a risk of at a minimum, having their system crippled. In the worst case scenario, their system could be penetrated and vital information needed to steal their identity could be obtained.

According to the latest annual threat report issued by the security software developer Symantec, over 286 million unique threats were encountered and identified. A 93 percent increase in Web based attacks was observed in 2010, the increase noted from statistics taken in the 2009 annual report. Accordingly, 6,253 new vulnerabilities in popular operating systems and applications such as Windows were recorded along with a 42 percent increase in vulnerabilities found in mobile phone based applications since 2009. While this is important for administrators and technicians, the most jarring statistics for the home user to notice comes from the observation that 260,000 identities were compromised and that stolen credit cards average in price from $0.07 to $100 per card.

In competing security firm McAfee’s first quarterly threat report of 2011, the report notes the rising presence of a new class of malicious software known as “bankers”. Bankers use special methods to appear as if they are a legitimate program or page operating on the behalf of well-known businesses such as UPS, FedEx, the United States Postal Service and the United States Internal Revenue Service. The report also notes the rise of the use of trap sites that appear in search results as being relevant to current events. In its words: “Many of these sites correspond to high-impact news events such as the assassination attempt on U.S Representative Gabrielle Giffords, the Japanese earthquake and tsunami, and major sporting dates” (McAfee 1).

UK based security firm Sophos (a competitor to both Symantec and McAfee, whose products are noted to be in use at Terra State Community College) also issued a threat report for 2011, based on data from the previous year. The report says that Sophos’ research laboratory analyzed 95,000 pieces of malware a day in 2010; which equates to an estimated total of 34,675,000 items. Of a primary concern to Sophos is the advent of malicious software that masquerades as a legitimate security product. Known as “scareware” or “rogueware”, Sophos says: “The user receives a warning that their system is infected with some nasty malware and is forced to pay for a “full” version of the software to remove the threat. Of course, paying money to the bad guys doesn’t provide any protection. In most cases there’s no real danger, and in many cases they’re actually installing additional malware on the system and taking credit card information,” (Sophos 1).

Another concern of interest to Sophos is the abuse of special marketing tools known as search engine optimizers. In their words: “The search engine is our gateway to the Web, and cybercriminals are skilled at manipulating search results from the engines such as Google, Bing and Yahoo! to lure victims to their malicious pages. These pages host security risks and browser exploits just waiting to infect users who are directed to these sites,” (Sophos 2).

To the common user, Sophos specifically focuses on the issue of social engineering techniques being used on social network websites. Social engineering by their definition “is a catch-all term for psychological tricks used to persuade people to undermine their own online security,” (Sophos 3). According to the report, the social networking website Facebook recorded half a billion active users, making it a popular target. One method of attack is called “clickjacking”. The mechanism, as explained by Sophos: “These attacks use maliciously created pages where the true function of a button is concealed beneath an opaque layer showing something entirely different. Often sharing or “liking” the content in question sends the attack out to contacts through newsfeeds and status updates, propagating the scam,” (Sophos 4).

For the mobile user, Sophos makes special mentions for the Android and iPhone platforms. The main problem on the iPhone according to Sophos is jailbreaking, which is a special routine that unlocks mobile security settings ostensibly for the reason of allowing the phone to have added functions. Unfortunately, jailbreaking opens the iPhone to an increased risk of executing malicious code and in Sophos’ words: “Jailbreaking [..] undermines Apple’s inherent security model and opens the user to more risk from social engineering tricks,” (Sophos 5).

In conclusion, when a home user enters the Internet, they are unknowingly sailing into a dangerous sea littered with hazards. In order to minimize your exposure to the threats mentioned, a combination of software and education is necessary. Major operating system applications such as Windows, Mac OS X and Linux have security updates issued on differentiating schedules. These updates patch previously overlooked vulnerabilities and as such are extremely necessary to keep up on and depending on how things are configured; these updates may be implemented automatically. To proactively repel and react to software threats such as viruses and malware, antivirus and antimalware software is also necessary. Free and commercial products are available, and reviews are issued regularly. A qualified technician’s opinion or thorough scrutiny of product reviews will yield the best solution for your needs. As for social engineering threats, it is best to examine what is being presented to you. If any kind of a warning flag pops up, do not commit any actions that a page or e-mail may suggest. For example, if you receive an e-mail purported to be from your bank, requesting your online banking password, it is likely to be a scam. The bank can directly make any changes to your account at its branches and headquarters, and any technical issues would be handled on-site by their IT staff. In a legitimate situation, they would not need to request the password to your account. Regardless of the situation, security should always be kept in consideration.

Works Cited
Symantec Corporation. “Symantec Internet Security Threat Report 2010” Link. Accessed 14 July 2011
McAfee Corporation. “McAfee Threats Report: First Quarter 2011” Link. Accessed 14 July 2011
Sophos Labs. “Sophos Security Threat Report 2011” Link. Accessed 14 July 2011

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-eats Pop Tarts while watching Nyan Cat OMEGA Extended Edition-

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-gags on the humid air and shuffles into the air conditioned Shack- I think I melted into my suit.

The Homebrew Scene
Honestly? I love the homebrew community (the true hackers). Industry juggernauts like the two Johns, the two Steves (Carmack and Romero as well as Jobs and Wozniak), Notch and even Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw started as homebrew developers. In a world dominated by greedy publishers and developers that generally end up being closed to maximize profit margins, the indies breathe new life into gaming with their innovative designs, common sense business and support principles and competitive prices (if there's a price at all). Instead of buying the next Call of Duty, you could get several indie made games for the same price and feel a lot more satisfied.

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Installed a new Firefox theme to replace my Red Alert 3 one.

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-sighs gently and waits around, thumbing through Memory Alpha-

Cooking Adventure!
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Cy-Fox here. What you know about nachos? What you know about value? Cy's going to show you haters how to make some mother-CAW!-ing epic nachos for under 10 dollars.

First we need some cheese. Not just some off-brand singles. Get yerself some Velveeta, chumps

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Chop some of that Velveeta into thin squares and put it in a bowl. Then add some salsa.

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And microwave that until the cheese melts. If it ain't melted, then run it through your hater microwave again. Stir that mixture up until it's smooth. But we ain't done yet. Be a man and add some Frank's Red Hot Sauce, you tired-eyed -caw-

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And stir it again. Then get yourself some Doritos and eat up.

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Next time, we cook eggs and bacon on the barrel of a machine gun.

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