Jan 9
This Time, I'm So Serious
Okay, wtf?
Once again, i have found myself anonymously dumped.
What does anonymously dumped mean?
Simple.
Its the term applied when your significant other decides to stand you up, ignore you, and not text or call you back. It's like theyre dropping hint after obvious hint.
And they think that shit is funny.
What ticks me off the most is perhaps the fact that i was just beginning to form a bond with him. I confided in him a lot of stuff; and only now do i realize i shouldntve trusted him. This is terrible! Its like he did it on purpose..
Well, i was really upset before, and still am, a little. But needless to say, im over it now.
The worst part? I work with them. Yepp. Theyre a co-worker. Yikes.
Oh, and i'd like to clarify that i did NOTHING to cause him to dump me like that.
In fact, i actually defended this person to my mother, who completely bashed him. She called him ugly and a retard (which i didnt think was true, but now im not feeling too nice), and i made her give him a chance.
He's a high school drop-out who's been working at this same fast food restaurant for years. He is far from a hottie and definitely not the sharpest toole in the toole box. HOWEVER, at one time i thought he was super sweet and nice, and he really liked me.
So i gave him a chance, and gave him every benefit of every doubt. I convinced my mother to give him a chance. I explained his situation to her and she started feeling sympathetic towards him. So she started treating.him like one of her own, offering to get him a better job, offering to help him get his GED (he's 4 years older than me) and offering to make him dinner and just basically looking out for him.
And me? I was just as supportive. I always lauded him and told him he's smarter than he gave himself credit for. I told him how happy he made me. I let him smoke with my little brothers, despite my protests. I spent New Years with him and my best friend of 7 years.
I trusted that low-life cock-sucking loser.
I tried to be a good girl for him, but, as usual, for some reason i just wasnt good enough.
It wouldnt suck so much if this was the first time something like this had happened. Unfortunately, this ALWAYS happens to me.
Ive always wondered why. Why? Ive been told im pretty, sometimes even beautiful or gorgeous (but idk). I know im smart. I have lots of talents and hobbies (martial arts, writing, singing, songwriting, flute for 7 years, rugby, track, i have a job, etc). I have a good amount of quality friends who all like me. I try to be a good Samaritan all the time.
So just WHAT exactly is it about me that makes it so guys never stick around?
Is it because i have no ass? :p
I have the personality to make up for it.
Although, i can be a little coarse and tom-boyish at times. But its never that bad. Its not as if i just, like, have gas attacks in public or check other girls out, cus i dont xP
Hmmm....
Well, until i figure it out... True to the title of this blog, i am officially FINISHED trying to find a relatioship. Screw guys. Screw love. Im solo-dolo from.here on out, and i dont mind it one bit. I'll adopt children when im older, if neccessary.
Peace, love, lots of hugs.
~K and add a C to it
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Comment by Wallace, Jan 9 2012, 07:34 PM
This is the same thing I've told Star about a hundred times, but I think you are just getting REALLY unlucky. I mean, I know for a FACT that nothing about you could've been the problem in any of these relationships. It's just that these guys are all assholes. Now, I know that I have absolutely no experience with this kind of stuff, but I refuse to believe differently than what I've just said.
Really breaks my heart to hear about this kind of stuff. And again, though I can't claim much validity for this as I have no experience on such matters, but I think that you shouldn't let a few rotten eggs and a few false starts convince you to stop looking. You shouldn't completely give up hope, not just with this, but with anything. Trudge through the shit to that perfect diamond at the end of the tunnel.
Maybe I'm just some stupid, inexperienced kid who's gotten the delusion stuck in his head that there are actually good, worthwhile things in this world. Either this kid'll eventually learn that searching for some hypothetical diamond in the sea of shit doesn't make it anymore real, or maybe that delusion will stick, for better or worse, until he defies the odds or dies searching. - Add new comment:
 7:38 PM Jul 24
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